Pleasurable Practices and Scripted Sex: A qualitative study exploring how cis-gender women with higher sexual desire than their male partners navigate sexual scripts

Abstract

This thesis explores how cis-gender women in a sexual relationship with a man, who experience higher levels of sexual desire than their male partners, navigate sexual scripts amid the discourse surrounding the orgasm- and pleasure gap. Women who have sex with men (WSM) experience the lowest likelihood of orgasm and overall sexual pleasure compared to individuals of other genders and sexual orientations (Frederick et al. 2018). This disparity is rooted in sexual scripts favouring male pleasure and penile-vaginal intercourse (Laan and Van Lunsen 2023). This thesis explores how sexual scripts are embedded within gendered and heteronormative frameworks, how WSM experience sexual pleasure in their sexual encounters, how these scripts affect and influence WSM with higher sexual desire than their partner, and how these women reconcile their sexual desire with societal expectations. By delving into the lived experiences of cisgender women aged 25 to 35 in sexual relationships with a male partner for over two years, holding Dutch nationality and residing in the Netherlands, my aim is to offer insights into the intricate dynamics of desire, pleasure, and negotiation of sexual scripts within the framework of societal norms. Through semi-structured interviews, offering an exploration of sexual pleasure and its intersection with gendered and heteronormative sexual scripts, my thesis aims to shed light on the often overlooked phenomenon of imbalanced sexual experiences and desires within woman-man intimate relationship. Drawing from Sexual Script Theory and Pleasure Theory, the results of this research indicate that WSM experiencing higher sexual desire than their male partners, navigate sexual scripts in varied ways, with these scripts being both reproduced and challenged at different moments in their sexual experiences. Through the insights of this research, I hope to enrich our understanding of the complexities inherent in intimate relationships, ultimately contributing to a world where sex is more pleasurable for all individuals